"Love & Consequences"

Kay did good hiding their relationship for the most part. Her mother didn’t find out about the two until after she graduated from high school, and that was only because Kay got pregnant. By that time, it was too late because abortion was no longer an option. Kassim proposed, they married and Kay transferred everything she owned to Delaware. It was time for them to make a house their home.

There wasn’t anything anyone could say or do to tear her away from Kassim, not even the females that approached her during the course of their relationship. Kay was blinded by the money and all the exquisite things. But after all the Gucci and Loui bags, shopping sprees and jewelry, it will never make up for all the stress and pain Kay endured in three short years. It was all game and lies from day one. Kay wasn’t naïve to the facts, but she grew accustomed being a fool in love. She didn’t know if she was afraid to be alone or just afraid to leave him because he was her first and ultimately her only lover. The one time she found the courage to leave, she was dragged back in to be by his side with more promises leading up to this day.

    

    

Back on the scene, the officer helped Kay climb into the back of the ambulance. “Come on so you can get to the hospital,” the officer directed. 

“Please Kassim don’t leave me. I can’t live without you.” Kay eyes filled with tears while holding her husband’s hand. As she looked down at his wedding band it made her cry harder. Kassim could hear every word but too weak to respond.

 

When they arrived at the hospital, Kassim was taken into surgery for three bullet wombs, one to the stomach, and two in the back. Kay sat in the waiting room wondering how things got so out of control. I tried to be the best wife I could be but he broke me down. The more I tried to give him my all, the more he took it for granted. I just wanted that dream life. Please Lord give him strength, don’t let him give up. Kassim is really a good man he just has issues. 

 

Kassim started his own real-estate business with one year of business school after graduating from Unity High School in West Philadelphia. He gracefully loves to help others, but women are his weakness. Kay told him time after time that a female was going to be his downfall. “You can’t keep playing wit people’s emotions and think you can get away wit it,” was a famous quote of hers. As much as Kay wished she were wrong, she was right.

 

“Aww baby, come here.” Kay’s mom approached her with open arms. 

     The sympathy made Kay whimper. “Mom, why is this happening? Why do bad things always happen to me?”

     “Shhh baby, it’s not you. Don’t you ever think this is about you.” She hugged tighter and began to cry with her stricken daughter. “He’s going to be alright, you watch and see.”

     “It’s not alright, Mom. It’ll never be alright.” Kay continued to sink in her mother’s chest sucking in the warmth. Her thoughts of sorrow switched to thoughts of her own pain. She’s sitting here holding me and telling me he’s going to be okay. I need to know I’m going to be okay. I’m tired of waking up at night alone, people playing on my phone, and always getting dirty looks in the street…This isn’t what I signed up for. Marriage is suppose to be serious, not a joke. Shit, I’m still young and in my prime. I took them vows and meant every word now my life is changed forever. For Better Or For Worse, Til Death Do Us Part! Why couldn’t he just do right? Damn, guess it’s too late to turn back now.

Seven Months Earlier

Caught Up In The Act

 

           

Kassim strolled through the door bright and early after staying out all night like everything was peaches and cream. Kay was in the basement standing at the wash machine continuing to pour in detergent like she never heard him come in. Kassim slowly made his way down the small flight of stairs and stood behind her without saying a word. 

     I could turn around and punch him right in the face. I don’t believe he kept his ass out all night again. Chill Kay, listen to what he has to say, she thought. She silently turned to face him with her hands tucked in her pink flannel robe.

     “Why you got insurance out on me?” he asked, tossing an opened envelope up on the dryer for her to see.

     Damn, I’ve been waiting forever for that to come and he got to it first. “What you mean why?” she responded, sounding smug. I can’t believe he has the nerve to come in here with that instead of pleading his case on why he didn’t make it in last night.

     “Why? What you plan on doing something to me?” he sarcastically asked.

     “No! But you do stupid shit.” Kay snatched the basket of clothes from off the dryer and headed out the basement. “You ain’t leaving me and my baby here with nothing,” she mumbled.

     Kassim’s tone became offensive. “Are you calling me stupid?”

     “I said you do stupid shit. Now go ahead cause I don’t feel like you in my face today.”

     He snatched the pants she was folding. “I’ll be in your face anytime I get ready. I pay the bills ‘round here.”

     Kay threw the whole basket at his head but he ducked. “Fuck you Kassim,” she yelled leaping at him like an acrobat.

     He restrained her blows. “Fuck me huh? You mean that?”

     “YES! You always struttin’ around here like I need you and I have to take this shit.”

     “You don’t need me,” he smirked. “I never said you did.”

     “Like I said, fuck you. I do this by choice, so don’t get it twisted.” He laughed like she was a comedian off Comic View. “Same thing that make you laugh will make you cry,” she smirked back.

     “So what you gon leave me?” he asked, arrogantly.

     “I’m not scared of you, Kassim.” She pushed pass him to gather the mess.

     “I don’t want you to be scared, but you better be smart.”

     Kay stopped to study the look in his eyes. “Was that a threat?”

     His reply was a big fat grin spread across his face. Kay rolled her eyes and continued to pick the clothes up off the floor. She threw them back into the basket and headed upstairs. Kassim followed on her tail.

     Aggravated and agitated but still trying to stay humble Kay politely said, “Don’t follow me. I don’t feel like this nonsense right now.”

     “Wut you gon do?”

     She pushed him back down a couple of steps. “Go ahead, damn!” 

     “Damn what? You gettin’ frustrated?”

     Kay stopped at the top of the stair case and took a deep breath. So many thoughts traveled through her mind. At any given point she was ready to explode like a ticking time bomb. Considering how all their fights end her in bed sore, she decided to let the idea fly by.

     He watched her two slender hands turn into fists. “You gon hit me?”

     That’s his problem. He never knows when to quit. “Why do you have to act so stupid all the time? You think this is a game but it’s not. One you gon be the one to wake up by yaself.”

     “So that’s what this about. You mad cause I didn’t come home last night?”

     “Since you brought it up, why didn’t you come home last night?”

     “I was working,” he shrugged. 

     Kay would have bought that excuse a year ago. Too bad she knew him better than that now.

     “On who?” she snapped.

     “Come on wit the bullshit, Takyah.”

     After five more minutes of him lying in her face she smacked him and went nonstop.  “Why you always gotta do this to me? Is it that good you can’t bring ya ass home to your family? I’m tired of you running around here like you Mr. Pimp. You’re married!”

     “I wasn’t wit no bitch.”

     “Whatever! You so fuckin’ stupid. If you were smart you wouldn’t get caught all the damn time.”

     He flagged her and proceeded back down the steps. “I’m out. I’m not trying to hear this shit.”

     Kay trailed behind him. As he turned to face her, she smacked him again. “Oh you gon hear what I got to say cause I’ve earned that much. Why you gotta spend the night out? Can’t you leave at a respectful time and pick up where you left off the next day if it’s that serious?”

She watched him stare at her like he wanted to flip out, but his guilt wouldn’t allow him to. “Are these whores worth you losing your family?”

     “I said I wasn’t wit no bitch. Damn!”

     “I wasn’t wit no bitch…I wasn’t wit no bitch…” she repeated, making a mockery out of him which caused more anger. “Whatever nigga, I’m not the same naïve little girl you first met.” 

     She smacked him again knowing how much he hated it, especially in the face.      

     “Ya not gonna keep smacking me, Kay. I’m gon fuck you up in a minute.”

     “Hit me cause you ain’t nothing but a pussy.”

     “I’ll be that for now to keep from beating ya ass,” he warned, walking towards the front door.

     He wasn’t getting out of it that easy. She followed punching him in his back as hard as possible. It was time for him to feel some of her pain. Enough was enough and she was fed up from the floor up. 

     Kassim being fed up too backhanded her. Kay landed flat on her ass. “Damn girl! I told you stop hitting me. Now get up.” He held out his hand to help.

     She smacked his hand away. “Leave me alone. Don’t touch me.” Kay crawled up from the floor and ran upstairs to the bedroom.

     When he came in she was curled up on the bed in fetal position crying. He called out her name a couple times standing in the doorway looking pitiful, but she didn’t respond so he stretched out beside her on the bed.

     “Kay, stop crying. I’m sorry.” He turned her around gently to face him. “I’m sorry.”

     “You’re always sorry, Kassim. I hear that more than I hear you say I love you.” She turned back the other way. “Why do you have to always put me through this? Do you really enjoy seeing me cry?”

     “You be trippin’ for nothing. I told you what I was doing last night.”

     “Stop lying!” she yelled in his face. “The stupid ass hoe you was wit got this number out ya phone when you was sleep or something. She called here this morning.”

     “What?” he said, looking like he got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He was so furious he began to turn red. Man I know that hoe ain’t call my house. I will get somebody to rip her apart if she even had the nerve. I need to stop messing with these stupid ass whores. How the hell did she get my phone out my pocket? I know I don’t sleep that hard.   

     “What nothing! You heard me,” Kay shouted. She stood up to get her point across.  “You keep allowing these dumb ass girls to disrespect me and your daughter. This supposed to be our home.”

     The pitch in his voice revealed his guilt. Kay sat back on the bed and began to cry. She knew deep down inside he would never try to hurt her intentionally. He was just sloppy at what he did. She also knew how he was before they married but was too caught up with all she had and could get. If it’s anybody’s fault, it was her own.

     “Baby, she’s lying. I was handling business. Call Smoke and ask him.”

     “You really think I’m stupid don’t you? That’s your cousin so he will say anything to cover ya back. Stop throwing him in the middle of your bull…”

     He cut her off. “I swear I’m not lying right now. I will find out who it was that called here, I promise you that.”

     “That won’t be too hard will it?”

     “I’m sorry baby.” He grabbed her into his arms forcing a passionate kiss on her well-deserved lips. He then began kissing all over her body to ease the painful tension between the two. Kay let him take full advantage of her fragile goods however he desired. Whoever said make up sex was the best was absolutely right, he smiled. 

    

    

Kay awoke around three o’clock that afternoon to a snoring Kassim. She thought about taking the Pepsi bottle from the dresser and clocking him upside his head with it, but her idea was distracted by the thought of her baby girl whom had to be picked up from daycare by five that evening.

    

Nizae Kaleema Hall was born on November 18, 2002. After Kassim found out Kay was pregnant, he took on the responsibility like a man. That’s when her mom butted in and started questioning when marriage would come about. That wasn’t something Kay was ready for, but she wasn’t ready for a child either. Although Nizae is loved dearly, Takyah wished she had waited just a few more years. 

    

“Kassim get up,” yelled Kay, pulling the sheets off the bed.

     “Whaaatttt?”

     “Get up! I need to wash these sheets.”

     “Wash them later. Damn girl, you always gotta...”

     “Get the hell up.” She cut him off by pulling the sheets from underneath him making him roll over to the edge.

     “What the fuck you do that for?” He hastily jumped to his feet slamming the door as he went into the connected bathroom.

     Kay yelled over the running water, “Hurry up cause you have to pick up Zae from school.”

     “I have something to do.”

     “Well, you have something else to do now. I didn’t get anything I wanted to get done messing with you.”

     “I ain’t got nothing to do with that. Do it tomorrow cause I said I have something to do.”

     “Dayum, you can never do anything when it comes to your daughter. Everything else is important right?”

     “I have to collect this money. I don’t see you complaining when it comes in and you buying what you want do I?”

     “Like I said, you always busy when it comes to ya daughter. She always screaming daddy and you never the hell here.”

     “Kay, don’t start this shit again. We just had a big party for her birthday. She had every damn character you can think of so don’t start wit me.”

     “Is that supposed to count? You supposed to be there for her birthday. You think that shit gon shut me up but it’s not.”

     “Go get her cause I can’t and that’s the end of it.”

     “You right, that’s the end of it.”

     “There you go wit ya smart ass mouth. Wut that suppose to mean?”

     “I didn’t stutter.” Kay exited the room not worried about getting the last word because she knew when the time came she would get the last laugh.

     “No, you didn’t stutter and neither did I so be on your way to go get her.”

    

     When Kay got back upstairs from putting the sheets in the wash, Kassim had already showered and gone. I’m getting so tired of living like this. There has got to be another way. Think think think Kay. He really needs to know that I can be gone and won’t think twice about it. Am I really ready for that move and do I want to put my little girl in the middle of this mess? A girl gotta do what a girl gotta do.

     Kay called the school to let them know she wouldn’t be there until about six. That was okay with the teacher being that would be an extra twenty dollars in her pocket for the additional hour. In a swift manner, she put new sheets on the bed, cleaned the bedroom and headed downstairs to do the same. By the time she was finished, the whole house smelled like Mr. Clean had been there himself. 

     I’m glad I’ve been stacking on the side for a rainy day because that day just came, she thought while gathering things for herself and her daughter.     

     After packing enough clothes to last them for a whole month, she got in her burgundy 2002 Range Rover and left without looking back. It’s hard trying to be a good girl, but it’s even harder tryna be the perfect wife. It’s not 60/40 or 70/30, it suppose to be 50/50 love.

 

    

By the time Kay arrived at the Baby & Toddler daycare center to pick up Zae, it was a quarter to six. Look at this chick, Kay thought as she watched a light-skinned petite female exit out the double steel doors of the entrance. This was just one of the females Kay had beef with in the past over Kassim after finding her number in his car. The female gave a spiteful stare back without blinking while walking past. Bitch!

     Nizae lit up when she noticed Kay at the classroom door. “Moommmmyy.” She ran over and pinned herself to Kay’s leg.

     “How’s mommy’s favorite baby? Did you have fun today?”

     “You and daddy pissure,” Zae smiled, trying her best to pronounce the words.

     Nizae passed Kay a colorful drawing that was supposed to be a man and a woman holding hands under a rainbow and her heart melted. She didn’t want to take Zae away from her dad, but he can’t keep playing daddy whenever he found time either. It’s not fair to her.

     “Let me talk to your teacher. Go play for a second.”

     Zae ran to the other side of the room where a couple of other children were playing and Kay walked over to the teacher’s desk.

     “Hello Mrs. Hall,” the salt n’ pepper haired teacher said walking up to greet her. You could tell just by her appearance and how alive she was at the end of the day that she was one who really enjoyed her job. 

     “I just wanted to let you know we’re going away so Zae won’t be in school for a little while.”

     “Is everything okay?” she asked, but when Kay responded with silence she decided to butt out. “Well okay, I’ll make a note for the office. Be safe and I’ll see you when you return.”

     “Alright! Come on Zae let’s go.”

    

Kay strapped Zae in her car seat and contacted her sister Lisa to let her know what was up. She really wasn’t ready for the lecture from her mother yet, but knew it would be just a matter of time before she expressed her opinion about how Kay needs to be stronger.

     “What’s up, Kay?” answered Lisa, glad to her sister’s voice. They had that sisterly bond that’s hard to find out in the world today.

     “Nothing much. You still up at the prison?”

     “You know I am. Tryna keep these niggas in check.”

     “Well, the money is good so that’s all that matters.”

     “Yeah, all the money up in here is good,” Lisa chuckled.

     Kay giggled knowing exactly what that statement meant.

     Lisa was a correctional officer for a Delaware County Prison. She knew just who to take up under her wing in there. It wasn’t hard to have them eating out the palms of her hands with her being built better than a brick house. Lisa stood at 5’8 with pretty long honey blonde hair and chestnut brown eyes to match her chestnut brown complexion. She had inmates paying their friends on the outside to take her shopping and pay her bills. It’s funny how when people get locked down they still make as much money as they were before going in.

     “You better be careful. You never know whose watching.”

     “It don’t even matter cause you know I’ll be taken care of most definitely.”

     “I can just imagine, but your ass need to be working to keep you out of trouble.”

     “Believe me when I tell you that I get in just as much trouble in here.” Kay gave a little sigh to hint about her dilemma. “Oh boy, what’s the matter now?” questioned Lisa.

     “I left Kassim but I don’t know where to go so he doesn’t find me.”

     “Kaaayyy…whhyyy?” she slurred.

     “Lisa, I talk to you more than anyone else so I know I don’t really have to answer that question.”

     “Well, you know he’ll be at me and mommy’s house first.”

     “I know but I don’t really want to have Zae in a hotel.”

     “Give me a second and I’ll call you right back.”

     “Alright, I’m going to the store to get a couple of things. Hurry up and call back.”

     Kay headed for the Wal-Mart on Roosevelt Boulevard, which was about ten minutes away from Lisa’s house, to shop around and get a few snacks. After putting Zae in a cart she walked isle by isle to pass time.    

     “Ooolll mommmyyy, I want these,” Zae whined for everything she saw.

     Kay threw it in the cart not really paying attention to what it was. Her main focus was on the female that had already walked pass the isle she was in four times staring in her direction. 

     I know this bitch ain’t bout to fuck with me while I got my daughter. Let me get the hell out of here cause that’s all I need right now. Kay got in line to make the purchases and walked to the car looking back over her shoulder each step of the way. This is exactly what I’m tired of. Never know whose out to get me. 

     When she noticed the female coming towards her in the parking lot, she quickly placed Zae in her car seat in case she had to whip out her Bruce Lee moves. 

     “Is your name Tamika?” the female asked, quickly approaching.     

     “No!” Kay responded bluntly.

     “Umm, you’re not Kassim’s wife?” she quizzed, looking at Zae through the window who was sticking her tongue out at her.

     “I said my name isn’t Tamika. Ain’t that what you asked?”

     “Well, are you Kassim’s wife?”

     “Listen,” said Kay, raising her right hand as if to testify. “Before you tell me who he’s fucking or what he’s doing, you can save it. I heard it all before.” She opened her door to get in the jeep making sure to keep the suspect in sight.

     “I just wanted to tell you that I’m the one who called this morning.”

     Kay paused and jumped back out. “Bitch, you had the nerve…” She stopped to regain her composure noticing Zae staring right at her. “Listen, you go finish playing house with Kassim okay. Have fun.” 

     Kay climbed in, rolled the window down and stuck her head halfway out. “And if you think you’re going to be driving one of these one day, think again cause he’ll be broke by the time I finished with him.” Kay sped off leaving the unidentified girl dumbfounded. The female was stuck for words assuming she would have gotten a lot more out of Kay, and if Zae weren’t in the car, she would have gotten just that. 

     I can’t believe she approached me. I could kill Kassim right now. If I didn’t have my daughter with me I would be in jail. Ooooo I’m so angry I could kill something. Calm down Kay, just calm down. In the midst of her thoughts Lisa called back. Kay answered while in the middle of an anxiety attack as she gasped for air.

     “Girl, calm down. Who done pissed you off that fast?”

     “Some chick called my house this morning and I just saw her in Wal-Mart. That’s exactly what I’m talking about,” cried Kay.

     “Stop crying. You’re out of there, now it’s up to you to make the next move.”

     “But I’m saying, these girls know who I am and I have no idea who they are. I had my baby with me. She coulda done anything.”

     “But she didn’t so calm down.”

     “I can’t calm down!” she screamed, scaring and bringing Nizae to tears.

     “Baby Cakes stop screaming in my ear please. I got something for you.”

     “What?” she asked, wiping the teardrops from her eyes as she pulled into a gas station. “Stop crying Zae. Mommy’s okay.” Kay passed Nizae her juice cup to calm her down.    

     “Meet me at my house in thirty minutes and I’ll take you to a spot,” advised Lisa.

     “What kind of spot? You know I’m not taking my baby just anywhere.”

     “You know I wouldn’t send you or my niece anywhere that isn’t safe. Come on now.”

     “Hurry up cause when he gets home and notice us missing he’ll come looking.”

     “You got the key to my house. I’ll be there in a little while.”

     By the time Kay got to her sister’s house, Zae had cried herself to sleep. She kept all the bags in the jeep and took Zae inside to lie down. A half hour later, Lisa came through the door.

     “Damn! I sure don’t smell nothing cooking.”

     “I’m not ya wife.”    

     “I’m glad cause if you left me I’d kill ya,” joked Lisa, plopping down on the sofa next to Kay. “Let’s go get something to eat.”

     “No, I wanna get out of here.”

     “Kay, you mind as well stay here tonight. If he comes here I’ll tell him you just need to cool off and you’ll be home tomorrow.”

     “You know he’s not going for that.”

     “The last thing he thinks is you’re leaving him. He will buy that if I convince him.”

     “Where is the spot you’re talking about?”

     “Over New Jersey in the Cherry Hill section so ya’ll don’t need to take that trip tonight. I’ll have to show you where it is anyway.”

     “If he pushes his way in here tonight, me and you gon fight.”

     “He knows not to even disrespect my house like that.”

     Kay thought about it for a moment before speaking, “Whatever…Whose house is in Jersey?”

     “A good friend of mine owns it. The spot is cool for the two of ya’ll.”

     “Hell no! I know ya not talking bout one of them jail birds.”

     “You minds well say the shit is mine cause I been taking care of it since he been down. He gives me the money to handle everything.” Lisa sat upright in the seat and grabbed a XXL magazine from the coffee table. “I stay up there when I wanna get away sometimes.”

     “Did you tell him I’m gonna be there?”

     “He said everything is good and he got some folks around there in case you need anything. Sis, it’s cool okay? I got you.” Lisa got up and headed to the kitchen sorting through her empty refrigerator. “I’ll be back I’m bout to go get something to eat.”

     “You ain’t leaving me in here by myself. I have to bring that stuff in out the jeep cause he will know something is up if he looks in there.”

     “Give me the keys. I’ll park it in the garage.”

     As Kay threw the keys, her cell phone rang. She knew it was Kassim because the ring tone was Between the Sheets by the Isley Brothers, which was a warning for his call. She looked at Lisa wondering whether to answer it or not. Her heartbeat picked up and her hands began to accrue a light sweat. Just before the last ring she found the nerve to pick up. She answered with a soft hello expecting to hear him bark through the phone, but got the opposite.

     “Hey baby, what you doing?” he asked.

     Right then, Kay knew he hadn’t been home yet to get the big surprise. It was going on ten o’clock and he was just calling talking about hey baby. She decided to play his game.

     “Just sitting here watching a movie and eating some popcorn.”

     “Where’s Zae?” he asked, like he didn’t know where she would be that time of night.

     “She’s asleep. Where else would she be?”

     “Oh, did you cook? I’m starving.”

     “Yeah, ya plate is in the microwave waiting on you,” she lied.

     “I’ll be there in a minute after I make this last drop.”

     “I saw your friend at Wal-Mart today. I know she called you as soon as I pulled off. Is that the type of chicks you into?”

     “What friend are you talking about now, Kay?”

     “The one you was wit last night. Stop playing dumb.”

     “I’ll see you when I get home so we can talk, okay?”

     “Alright Sweetie, I’ll wait up for you.”

     “I love you, Kay.”

     “Shoulda loved me sooner,” she responded and hung up the phone.

     Lisa came back in after parking the Jeep catching the tale end of the call. From the relieved expression on Kay’s face that only meant one thing.

    “He doesn’t even know you’re gone does he?”

     “Nope!”

     “He’ll be calling back soon. I’m running to the Chinese store while I got a chance. I’ll bring you something back.” Lisa playfully smacked Kay’s leg and headed out the door. “Don’t be scared either punk, I’ll be right back.”